There's no place like home

The drifter, so they called me, as I could not settle.

I have made home of many places throughout my life, but never have my roots grown deep enough to keep me in, down and in place.

I have lived everywhere. I have lived in places many would consider to be hell of earth.

I was there, many times before! I still carry its map and know never to cross its borders again!

No matter where I go, no matter how long I am away, nothing and I mean nothing could ever keep me away from where I truly belong - Home!

In just a matter of a few weeks, my life will start anew, back to the soil I once walked as a child.

To be able to walk the streets blindfolded and to know exactly where I am - this could only come with a great sense of comfort and knowledge that I know where I belong!

No matter how far I have drifted, my roots never once left home's soil.

Here's hoping that the winds will die down for once in my life and that I never feel the urge to fly away again!

As Dorothy once said it best: "There's no place like home!"

My ruby slippers have clicked their heals...

Home, here I come!

Tired Am I

I tossed and turned.

I tossed and turned so much last night, that I could no more!

Too many thoughts ran through my head.

Too many images needed to be processed, filtered and filed!

I am so tired, not only physically, but emotionally!

I am at a point where I honestly question...

How peaceful would a coma be?

To be fed and not have to cook.

To pee under myself and not have to move once.

To have my hair brushed, body cleaned, nails cut...

Seems like quite the spa treatment if you ask me!

When will I sleep soundly again?

When will my eyes close at night and not reopen until there is light?

I am tired.

I need my sleep.

When will my nightmare end?

The irony is...

I AM AWAKE!

T-N-T

Imagine being forced to light a stick of dynamite, knowing fully that the wick's length isn't long enough for you to run clear from its damaging effects!
As if that weren't enough, imagine the stick going off by remote detonator, proudly held by the hands of a vile creature, should you dare decide not to light it!
No matter which way you look at it, your goose is cooked!
What thoughts could possibly be running through your head?
Your life hangs in the balance and the one person who can save you, has wanted you dead before you were even born!
Do you then start believing in miracles? Is there really a higher power out there?
If God could walk on water and split the red sea...could he not spare a single lightning bolt?
If I were to die at that moment, I would rather it be by God's will and not by the hands of the one person who has cursed the day I took my first breath!
I am not a religious person, but in this situation, I am more than ready to repent for all my sins!

Life's Endless Journey

For as long as I can remember, I have always been drifting, like a single leaf in the wind on a cool Autumn day.

When will I finally settle? When will I lay my hat down and never again pick it up?

It seems that every time I think everything in my life is perfect, something or someone always has to come along and ruin things for me.

Makes me wonder why I even try to make a life for myself, when I know deep down it will soon be dismantled, destroyed beyond recognition!

A new path lays before me, once again!

What does this road ahead of me hold? This I do not know. One thing I do know is that no matter what may come my way, I will make the best of it, no matter how hard or ugly things may get.

My life is an endless journey...

It will end, when I can finally smell the flowers from the roots up!

Cry for help

Imagine yourself laying there,

wounded, disfigured beyond recognition.
As you continuously get bombarded,

fired at and assaulted from all sides.
To say you are hurt would be such comfort,

as the pain you feel has well surpassed any normal level of tolerance.
You lay there bleeding.

Your once blue jacket has now changed to a rainbow of deep reds and even darker purples.
You are growing weaker as time passes you by.
How much more can you take?

How much longer will you fight for a life,

which has brought you nothing more than pain and suffering?
Your only saving grace at this time,

is the micro sliver of hope you still carry deep within your soul.
You find yourself asking, over and over:
"Why me? Why is this happening to me? What have I done?

What have I done so wrong

to deserve all of which is happening to me?"
As you lay your head back onto the ground, eyes open to the sky,

you gather whatever energy you have left and let out a final scream...
Only one question remains...
Did anyone hear you?